9th month post op!

It has been an amazing journey. From walking into the hospital to be wheeled into the surgery waiting area, then wheeled into the operating theatre, witnessing the huge lights and seeing surgeons with their surgical masks. Then waking up in a hospital, being on a drip, etc.

Starting physiotherapy with Karen, then with Meiyi taking over. Thankful for the two beautiful women who changed my life over the short span of (1 year and) 9 months. It was amazing witnessing myself taking my first few steps again I vividly remember Karen pulling my shorts to prevent me from falling, and then I started jumping and Meiyi was there with her hands for me to grab and was a pole for me whenever I needed support, even when doing squats. Soon after I witness myself starting to run, then faster and faster and getting more even with my footsteps. Words can never express my gratitude to them because they've shown me that I can take on the world, even without an ACL.

Feeling empty that I'm officially off physio, but I'm glad I've made it through and would never want to be back again.

OFF PHYSIO

Officially off physiotherapy although I still think I'm not ready yet despite my strength, jumps, etc were "good enough" for my return to Netball.

Maybe I should try to stop being where I was, last time, being a competitive athlete. Maybe I should just stop trying to achieve where I was when I fell down.

Then I look back and there, I see myself during training, able to complete 2.4km within 12 mins, suicide run in 25 seconds (being one of the faster ones), running and sprinting without having to bother whether my knee can take it, "flying" on court, doing nice interceptions, etc. There're too many countless things.

But the thing is, I can't do any of those right now.

I take 20 mins to complete 2.4km. I can't sprint. I feel slower than a snail despite trying my very best. Sometimes I wonder if this ACL recon was even worth it. I've lost all my strength on court.

Maybe I should stop trying.
Maybe I'm just not cut out for this.

I miss netball.
I miss competitive netball.

Rehab day 14

Quads 90%
Hamstring 50%

Hate it when the mind says "go", but the knee says "no".....

Rehab day 13

Hamstring and quads weights leg lift, single leg squats, single leg bridging, dynamic lunges. Butt aching like hell now but I am loving the aches!

Rehab day 12

Did lots of weights, squats and lunges. Started with hamstring and quads weight lift x 2 sets. Then was single leg squats on blue foam, wobble board and blue circle air thingy and without anything. Couldn't balance initially but Meiyi was there holding my hips stomach butt as I was doing, letting me hold her hand and promising she'll never let me fall.

I'm so glad because with rehab I've learnt how to trust people when they say they'll never let me fall (like literally).

Moving on I did legs lift both sideways and upwards, with 2 kilos of weight which was hell. And I saw miss toh at rehab too! Such a coincidence. Then dynamic lunges front and back, 2 sets! Crazy shit tiring but I hope I'll have muscle aches tomorrow when I wake up :)

Piano lesson was next, nothing different but was so enjoyable! Nothing better than doing everything you love on the same day! Lots of mistakes in theory, must really buck up. Learnt new pieces oh yay. :)

Met up with Fadhilah and even though it was a short meet up but it was fun while it lasted! I had a really good day today!

Rehab day 11

I'm so tired I can die. 5mins of warm up cycling followed by 3mins + 7mins cycling (with some testing of strength of knee in between). 3 sets of 10 x quads + hamstring weights leg lift. I think my strength is improving! Oh yes. Maybe like by 1kg? Then 3 sets of 10 x double leg wall squats with the big ball. Then 3 sets of 10 x static lunges x both legs. And i died and went to rainbow heaven after that.

Rehab day 10

Single leg squats, hamstring & quads weights lift 12 x 3 sets, standing broad jump, high knee run x10 sets (nearly died while doing this!), staircase drill, 10 min run.

The(two)Rapists who make my rehab as deep as hell can bring me but amazingly fun!

Pretty meiyi with ugly me!

Karen in the uniform! this is going on my Polaroid wall! Pretty!

Rehab day 9

Zomg I'm actually penning this entry in the mrt on the way home. Rehab just ended, time check: 5.01pm.

I love weeks when I have rehab, at least I have something to look forward to during the week! :) Rehab was so so so tiring today I nearly died.

Started the session with 10 mins of cycling, followed by 10x single leg hop and squats.

Oh shit old age is catching up on me. I actually forgot what I did zzzzz.

Did hamstring and quads weight lift and I sucked at that terribly. I think I had no improvement.. And yaaaa I think I did 4 sets skipping, both forward and backwards. Then 4 sets of side steps also there and back.

Then I did leg lift (up to the hand, shoulder height), both straight and sidewards. Omgomgomg and I was literally dead after that.

Meiyi put me through the phone to Karen after rehab! Yay. She's coming back :)

Note to self: no running if knees hurt/ add in the leg lift (front and side) to daily exercises/ ice every day if possible

Love love rehab.

Rehab day 8

My knee's having a fever.
So apparently it's rather inflamed right now :(

Knee's been hurting so no weight bearing exercises for today!
Did weights for quads and hamstring, and my strength improved!
Didn't take note of the weights though..

Was talking about jobs and was asked by meiyi to do pt.
But there's no way I can do pt unless I go overseas :(
So meiyi suggested for me to do music therapy! :)
But I just checked it out... No school's offering art/music therapy for bachelor's degree.
Sigh..

Balanced on the air space thingy, then switched over to the foam board.
Threw balls while balancing on that, but I sucked at it cos I couldn't multitask.
Went up and down the steps for a while.
Then did 90 deg leg lift!
Then 10 minutes cycle which nearly killed me.

Was fun!
I love physio.
So much laughter and joy.

Rehab day 7

BY FAR THE MOST TORTUROUS REHAB SESSION IN HISTORY, MEIYI WAS INSANE TODAY I SWEAR.

Hahaha, it was tiring but still fun! So apparently I haven't been doing my squats properly so I had to change my posture.

24 dynamic lunges X 3 sets
Hamstring lift (L/R) 12 each X 3 sets
Quads lift (L/R) 12 each X 3 sets
Back leg lift 12 each X 3 sets
Single leg squats (L) 12 each X 3 sets

So far my leg strength is crazily weak, so I really really got to work on that. 60 pounds / 7 pounds (Quads x Hamstring) for left leg,
30 pounds / 1 pound for right leg.

The whole rehab center knows that I had hell rehab today, haha. But I'm so glad for all of these. So glad to be in paeds because my therapists wants me to get well more than I want myself. :) :) :) I'm thankful.

Virgin post op run

Decked in team canberra's jersey because i felt more motivated to run in it. Because I know they'll always have my back. ;)

Ran about 3 km and it took around 15-20 minutes. Not a lot, but I'm trying. Was tiring but am glad I managed to complete the distance without stopping! Knee's still very weak and I can really feel it but I will work on it. :)

Rehab day 6

138 degree bend. Granted permission to run. Played hop skotch with meiyi. Jumped on the trampoline. Did squats and lunges. Muscles aching like mad but am absolutely loving the aches.

Piano lesson at parkway parade today. The journey there and back home wad crazy, at least 4 hours traveling time in total. Super exhausted right now but it's all really worth it.

The piano at parkway was hollow and super loud as compared to the musky ones I use in my classroom in paragon. Screwed up today's lesson slightly but I cannot blame the piano, I just got to get used to the different kind of pianos. Need to work on it. I am really blessed for my piano teacher. Appreciate and really enjoy every single lesson I have with her. Shopping after lesson + htht in the cab on the way back. Am reallyy thankful for her. She's like the only teacher who has never given up on me. I need to work really hard. I don't want to disappoint.

Rehab day 5

120 degree bend.
Learnt to jump.
Learnt to squat.

"hold my hand, trust me"
Thank you Meiyi for being there. For just being there.

Next session of rehab: running time!

6 months to liberation. Can't wait!!

Really want to play competitive Netball after recovery. But I have no team to play for and I don't want history to repeat itself all over again.. Oh well that's 6 months later..

Rehab day 4

Was crazzzzzyyy. Did leg strengthening exercises, squats, wobble board balance, rode on the stationary bicycle and played Wii. Sounds little but was enough to tire me through the whole day.

Piano mini mock exam with the piano teacher and I think I did not bad, at least I didn't get a zero for my ear test. No piano lesson for the next two weeks till my official mock exam and I'm freaking out. The piano teacher told me, "I'm not worried about you!" --Is that something to be happy about?

Rehab day 3

Pretty Karen: The person behind my awesome+fun+tiring rehab sessions.

Knee has 113 degree bend, and Karen said my knee is still slightly screwed...because it still cannot straighten fully. Le sigh. Need more improvements. Need to do my exercises even more. Gonna miss Karen for the next 3 months :(

School starts tomorrow, and I'm not ready for it. Because 1) I still cannot walk very well and SEG is so bloody far from the mrt. 2) We're all split into different classes. 3) I have no friends that's in the same class as me. 4) Tanliting has officially quit school and left me alone, hence I'm #foreveralone.

3 words can sum up about school: I.HATE.SCHOOL.

Rehab day one

Back from rehab, I don't know why I'm so tired. On a happy note, my knee has a 80 degree bend already! And my brace has been changed from 0 to 30 degrees! Totally can't wait for the day where I'll be able to walk without any assistance.

Fell down so many times today but so glad Karen was there to support me, she was holding my pants and supporting my hips as I was 'learning' to walk. Ah I'm so tired... But I'm so glad my knee is getting better! :)

Am always pretty hyped up when I talk about the things I love! I've been loving my new knee and I love rehab so I've been talking about this for the past few days! :) Okay I'm off to supre to do some retail therapy! :)

Happy girl!

My parcel from Supre has arrived! So satisfied with their service, it's so efficient! It's only been three days since I sent in my order! I love it when my parcels arrive and I'm going to get *ahem* more *ahem* clothes ;p

And on a happy note, Karen and Mae called me to tell me they're seeing me for rehab! I was complaining my ass off to Karen about how unhappy I was because they removed me from peads and placed in sports rehab instead and she called me this morning saying, "You're seeing me for rehab tomorrow!" Hahaha omg words cannot express how happy I was till I cannot sleep anymore omg. I really don't know what I'd do without them both :')